Episode 31 Tracey and Mark Russell

KickAss Couples Podcast

This week Matthew and Kim have a remarkable interview with Mark and Tracey Russell. What makes this couple so unique is their redeeming story of how they reached the breaking point in their relationship and then rebuilt a rock-solid foundation of deep love and trust. Mark and Tracey met in high school and married shortly after college. While on their honeymoon Tracey knew something was deeply wrong and Mark admitted “I don’t know if we should have gotten married”. After trying to make it work for two years, they ended up divorced and were left to face their own personal demons. After significant growth and healing they found their way back to each other, remarried, have four beautiful children, and remain committed to doing what it takes to have a kick-ass marriage. Learn how this couple demonstrated commitment, trust, selflessness and became each other’s strongest support system.

Key Ideas:

-The problems with idealizing marriage

-Divorce and remarriage

-Coping with death in a marriage

-Grieving together

Quotes:

“From a marriage standpoint, commitment is really regardless, working through it, regardless approaching it with humility.” - Mark

“Commitment in marriage for Tracey and I is never using the D-word, the divorce word, that’s not an option.” - Mark

“Commitment is the invisible foundation of every home that’s holding it up…the integrity of that foundation is holding everything up.” - Tracey

“Truly my life was about me and you know that led to really a lot of the results and destruction of our marriage right out of the gate.” - Mark

“I was going to have to let Mark go if that commitment was not there if he didn’t want to be in marriage to me… then open the door and let them go, and that’s what happened, and that was the toughest thing I ever did.” - Tracey

“There are ways to get through things together and not apart and that's a process. That's something you learn.” - Mark

“A lot of times I think we communicate a lot better when I separate from the situation and I don’t make it about myself I just really, empathetically make it about her.” - Mark

“She was upset about something and I couldn’t get to the bottom of it and she said, just ask me questions, so the whole dinner I just asked her questions. I didn’

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