6 steps to self-love after heartache

Dr Sarah: Relationship Success Lab

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Let's talk about self-love today. Why is it crucial? It's necessary in any relationship, whether you're single and looking for a partner or struggling with your current relationship. Social media talks a lot about self-love, but here's my take. Loving yourself isn't easy. If you're listening, you've probably dealt with self-doubt and insecurity, making it hard to love yourself freely. Conditional assumptions about love, like "I'll love myself if I achieve X," add to the struggle. So, how do we love ourselves unconditionally? It's about realizing our worth regardless of achievements or appearances. This can be tough to grasp because we're used to conditional worth.

Breaking out of this cycle is crucial. Self-criticism reinforces conditional worth, creating a negative loop. This loop becomes ingrained in our brains, affecting our emotions and responses. But breaking this cycle changes relationships. It improves communication, boundaries, and confidence. So, how do we break free?

It's about understanding the deeper intentions behind self-criticism. We often criticize ourselves to motivate improvement, but this stems from childhood experiences and circumstances. Forgiving our past selves and recognizing that worth isn't tied to achievements or circumstances is key. It's about offering ourselves the same compassion we would a friend in need.

So, write down messages of self-compassion and repeat them daily to rewire our brains for unconditional self-love. It's a process of unlearning old beliefs and embracing infinite self-worth.

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