Trauma!

My Inner Torch

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In this podcast, I share my journey through the trauma I experienced from a long-term marriage with someone I suspect is a covert narcissist. I reflect on the early days when I idealized my partner, only to later uncover troubling behaviors and red flags. I delve into the psychological manipulation that often characterizes these relationships, particularly the DARVO concept, where the abuser deflects blame onto the victim, leaving me confused about the true nature of my past experiences. I use the analogy of being bitten by a snake to illustrate how I tended to focus on understanding the abuse rather than on healing from it.

Throughout this podcast, I explore the complexities of recognizing and accepting emotional abuse. I recount my confusion over behaviors like the silent treatment and ghosting, and I detail my journey from denial to self-discovery. I acknowledge a pivotal shift in my understanding of my partner’s traits; I went from labeling her as borderline to recognizing covert narcissism, which is often much harder to detect. Accepting the reality of my relationship was painful, yet it was crucial for my healing and empowerment.

I also share the insights I gained from my experiences, emphasizing the importance of fully healing before entering new relationships to avoid repeating past mistakes. I express gratitude toward my spouse for helping me gain clarity on unhealthy dynamics, and I commit to sharing the lessons I’ve learned through this podcast. I hope to encourage you, my listeners to apply these insights in your own life.

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