Episode 29 : Part 5 - Finding yourself, a tale not just for movies

Letters to my kids: A suicide survivor's lessons and advice for life

Episode 29 : Part 5 - Finding yourself, a tale not just for movies

Music: “Just A Blip” by Andy G. Cohen From the Free Music Archive Released under a Creative Commons Attribution International License

https://allisonfallon.com/finding-yourself/ https://www.wikihow.com/Find-Yourself

- Realize that some people will become jealous, afraid, or overwhelmed when a person changes their usual habits and grows more mature and self-loving (others will love it). It's a threat to the relationship you've always had

- Abandon the negative. Although it sounds abstract, it's not difficult. Make a conscious effort to minimize judging — others, objects, and yourself. This is for two reasons: 1) Positivity is nourishing and can usher in a sense of happiness which being "lost" masks, and 2) Opening your mind to new experiences and new people (that you previously wrote off) will show you a whole new world that may be better than the one you knew before

- Question yourself. Ask yourself difficult and far-reaching questions, and record your answers. Then every time you reflect, you can review your notes and take it a step further, instead of answering the same questions all over again.

"Don't spend all of your time trying to FIND yourself. Spend your time CREATING yourself into a person that you'll be proud of." -Sonya Parker

"If I had all the resources in the world — if I didn't need to make money — what would I be doing with my life and why?"

"What do I want to look back on in my life and say that I never regretted?" "If I had to choose three words to describe the kind of person I'd love to be, what would those words be?"

- If you do have a truly negative trait, acknowledging it openly can give you the motivation to work on redirecting that energy to something positive. Try channelling that bad habit and into a hobby.

"Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power." -Lao-Tzu

- "Who am I?" This question is not static. It should be one you continue to ask yourself throughout your life. A healthy person continues to reinvent themselves throughout their life. By asking this question regularly, it updates your understanding of who you are and how you change.

- Settling In for Good Act upon — and use — your newly discovered knowledge. Pick up those watercolors. Write a short story. Plan a trip to Mombasa.

"The well bred contradict other people. The wise contradict themselves."- Oscar Wilde

- You may shake your head and come up with excuses such as "no time," "no money," "family responsibilities," etc. Instead of using these as excuses, start planning around the hurdles in your life. You can free up time, find money, and get a break from duties if you make time how to plan and find the courage to ask for these things.

- Be ready for dead ends. Finding yourself is a journey, not a destination. A lot of it is trial and error. That's the price you pay in return for the satisfaction you receive - It's not going to be easy — it never has been for anybody — but if you learn to see that as a chance to prove how much you want to find yourself, then you'll find fulfillment and security in your pursuit.

Serve others. Mahatma Gandhi once said that "the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others."

-Being introspective without reaching out to others can cause you to navel-gaze and shut yourself off from others. Service to other people and to the community is the ultimate way to find purpose and a sense of your place in the world. When you see how hard life can be for those in greater need than you, it's often a wake-up call that puts your own worries, concerns, and issues into perspective. It helps you to see what you do have, and the opportunities you've been able to seize through life.

"There is no satisfaction that can compare with looking back across the years and finding you’ve grown in self-control, judgment, generosity, and unselfishness."- Ella Wheeler Wilcox