What Happy People Know - 3 Steps to Feel Happier Instantly | Ep. #23

Be version 2.0 of yourself – Personal development and self-help tips

What happy people know is that they can control their emotions.

If they feel down, they make themselves feel better instantly.

Here’s their 3-step method that you can benefit from right away.

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Here is the ultimate question that we need to answer to understand what happiness is about:

Do circumstances make us happy or do we choose to be happy?

Happy or depressed? It’s a choice

One good example is Owen Cook, a self-improvement and dating guru also known as Tyler.

When he started years ago, he wanted success so much that he decided to allow himself to be happy only after he got successful.

He pushed for results and felt miserable.

In the mid-2000s, his training business took off.

He was able to enjoy his dream lifestyle.

He went to live in a beautiful apartment overlooking the ocean in Hawaii

with a beautiful girlfriend.

He went to five-star dinners every day.

He traveled a lot.

How do you think he felt?

He was still as miserable as before.

Even though he had everything, his subconscious mind focused on something that he didn’t have such as even more money.

Our brain is a survival tool that is hundreds of thousands years old .

It always finds something that we don’t have and focuses on it.

It goes, “Danger, danger” to ensure our survival.

To be happier, we need to retrain it to be more reasonable.

What happy people know is that they can use Tony Robbins’ Triad for that.

Step 1: Changing physiology

The first step of the Triad is changing my physiology.

When I feel great, I notice that my back is straight, I smile, and I breathe deeply.

The feeling causes this physiology .

But it also works the other way round.

When I recreate this physiology, it triggers the feeling.

Wayne Dyer told Tony Robbins in an interview that he had spent 30 minutes laughing with his son before the interview.

When he did this, his physiology changed and his mind followed quickly.

I tried it with my son and it worked like magic.

Last year, we were taking a walk in Oslo, Sweden.

He saw a moving light that was coming from a theater and started following and dancing in that light .

He was having such a great time that I got jealous.

But then I thought, “Wait a second, I can do that too!”

I joined him and this dancing changed how I felt.``

Step 2: Focusing on the positive

The second part of the Triad is our mental focus.

I had a mild depression years ago.

Sometimes, I would start feeling better.

And then I would think, “Wait, am I feeling happy? No, I can’t allow myself to do that.”

And I went back to focusing on depression.

When I change my mental focus, I feel better.

Continuing with kids as a role model, I remember how I could play with a toy for hours as a kid.

My mental focus was on the toy 100% and I forgot about everything else including negative things such as being hungry or wanting to pee.

Today, I emulate my younger self.

I focus on what I am doing and let it consume me instead of thinking of negative stuff.

Step 3: Using uplifting language

The third part of the Triad is using uplifting language.

It’s not just what we think that makes us unhappy, but also the specific language we use.

When I was depressed, I used to say to myself that everything felt like an

uphill battle .

Waking up, taking my dog for a walk, making breakfast, going to work—everything.

And I kept playing these words over and over in my mind: “Uphill battle, uphill battle, uphill battle.”

This language only reinforced depression.

What I should’ve done was replacing that language with a more positive mantra.

Continuing with kids as a role model, I could’ve said “Water slide” instead.

And I would’ve felt like a kid who is happy going down a water slide.

Actionable tip

This is what happy people know.

By changing our physiology, mental focus, and language, we change our emotional state.

Kids know how to be happy unconsciously.

Be around them and model them for fast results.

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HELP AND LINKS:

If you need relationship advice, I’m here to help. I’m a life coach in Toronto: book a free coaching session with me through https://romanmironov.com/

Counseling Before Marriage – A Sad Story To Watch Before Engagement (relationship advice video): https://romanmironov.com/blog/counseling-before-marriage/

My Child is Lazy and Unmotivated – 4 Principles to Bring Out the Best in Them | Ep. #21 (self-help podcast): https://romanmironov.com/blog/my-child-is-lazy-and-unmotivated/

I Am Miserable – How to Stop Feeling Miserable in 5 Minutes or Less (personal development article): https://romanmironov.com/blog/i-am-miserable/

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SUBSCRIBE AND CONNECT:

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►Let’s connect on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/roman.mironov.10

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ABOUT ME:

I am a Robbins-Madanes-certified Strategic Interventionist, helping clients strengthen their relationships.

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LINKS I'VE MENTIONED:

Wayne Dyer’s interview with Tony Robbins: https://youtu.be/JBYO4M_c9UY

Tony Robbins’ Emotional Triad: https://www.tonyrobbins.com/stories/unleash-the-power/discover-your-peak-state/

How do some people manage to be happy even when life deals them lemons?

#Happiness #Emotions #LifeCoach