Wrinkles the Clown (2019): Our Worst PSA to a 10 Year Old

Honestly? Hell Yeah

It's a digital folklore tale as old as time: Not so long ago, in a simpler time, a pandemic would break out from the swampy streets of Florida unlike any we've seen before or since. Suddenly, creepy clowns were plaguing the streets and the internet alike, terrorizing stupid kids and obnoxious teenagers all throughout the nation (but mostly Texas). However, this mania couldn't be traced back to a bat or mosquito, but instead a sudden influx of ominous stickers featuring a melty clown face with a message reading: "WRINKLES THE CLOWN 407-734-0254." Join us as we follow the man behind the mask, witnessing a day in the life of a retired, liver-spotted van dweller who lives off a steady diet of Natural Ice, titty bars, frozen dinners, and 3,845 daily voicemails from parents begging them to come kill their kids. It's not depressing or stupid at all, we promise!