Broken Marriage 公開
[search 0]
もっと
Download the App!
show episodes
 
Artwork

1
Beyond Broken Vows | Christian Marriage, Adultery, Pornography Addiction, Sexual Betrayal, Intimacy

Emily & Johnny Spigelmire | Christian Marriage Recovery Coaches

Unsubscribe
Unsubscribe
ウィークリー
 
***Top 1.5% Global Podcast*** Dear Betrayed, Are you in shock? Confused, devastated, hurt, angry and feeling like you are not enough? Do you feel like it must be your fault, like you should have somehow seen the signs? Are you grieving the death of the marriage you thought you had? Dear Betrayer, Have you been believing the lie that if people knew what was really in your heart and mind, they would turn their back on you? Have you been convinced that your wife and family would leave you and y ...
  continue reading
 
Loading …
show series
 
Have you ever found yourself in a situation that totally surprised you, leaving you unsure of how to react? It happens to all of us! When we’re on the journey to recovering from sex addiction, those unexpected moments can be particularly challenging. It’s important to be aware and not let our guard down, as staying vigilant plays a crucial role in …
  continue reading
 
When you hear the statement, "I do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it". What thoughts and/or emotions surface immediately? Our experience has shown us that the initial reaction from a betrayed spouse will likely differ from that of the one who has broken faith. The former will react in a posture of, "You better regret your past!". …
  continue reading
 
Have you ever wondered how to hear God speaking to you? When we have deep wounds such as betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues, we can feel desperate to hear the voice of God. We want him to tell us what to do to get relief from the ever-present pain and anxiety we are experiencing to find freedom and healing. Today we are so excited to share…
  continue reading
 
If you are listening to our podcast on a regular basis, and we hope you are, you are likely working hard to stay married after porn-fueled infidelity. One challenging area that needs to be addressed in the recovery process is shame and guilt. Many times, shame and guilt are used interchangeably as though they are the same. Do you know there’s a dif…
  continue reading
 
We know our story of sexual betrayal and recovery is not the only one out there, so we are excited to share with you a compelling conversation we had with Steve Shields from the Unashamed Unafraid podcast. He tells his unique and very personal story of how a Christian man trapped in porn addiction was able to come to terms with his powerlessness, a…
  continue reading
 
We had planned to update and replay episodes all this month to help us take things a little slower for our anniversary. Well, we got of our 2 most popular shows out, but this week we decided to share some new content with you. We want to give some encouragement and a little guidance to those of you who are struggling in the storm of your broken mar…
  continue reading
 
It's been almost a year and a half since we first told our stories of sexual addiction and betrayal on our podcast. A lot has happened since then! We are so very grateful for the recovery, healing, and growth that both of us have experienced since D-Day in 2018. It has been due to God's help, tons of hard work on our part, and a great support commu…
  continue reading
 
September is our anniversary month and we're celebrating by taking a break from creating new episodes this month, but rather updating and replaying a few of our most popular episodes. Today we are revisiting Episode #2 Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me, where Emily bares her soul to tell the story of Johnny's marital infidelity* fueled by pornograp…
  continue reading
 
Wives, do you have a desire for your husband to lead you and your family spiritually? Of course! Husbands, are you at a loss for what that looks like and how you can show up for your wife in this area? Yeah, probably. Unfortunately, in many Christian marriages, this is often a reality. A wife will take up the responsibility of being the spiritual h…
  continue reading
 
Wives, are you trying to communicate your feelings to your husband and somehow it always ends up being about him. Are just not feeling seen, heard and validated? Men, is your wife explaining to you how she feels or coming at you with big emotions and you find yourself at a loss of how to respond? This can happen in any marriage, but when sexual bet…
  continue reading
 
How much do you value keeping your word? And how does it make you feel when someone doesn't keep their word? For a betrayed wife, it becomes even more important that her recovering husband keep his word. This new display of reliability provides the safety and security that she desperately needs in a time of confusion and broken trust. When he makes…
  continue reading
 
We all have priorities, whether we make them intentionally or they exist by default. At times our priorities can be misguided and cause pain for ourselves and for others. We also understand that priorities are important and it’s necessary to have them in the right order. And for a betrayed wife, it’s imperative to know that she is a priority to her…
  continue reading
 
Following the revelation of sexual betrayal, a couple must decide whether to stay together or not. Choosing to stay married initiates a complex journey of recovery and healing, filled with challenges and triumphs. However, the journey may be prolonged due to the betrayer's lack of understanding the needs of the betrayed. Initially, the focus is on …
  continue reading
 
Has the reality of porn-fueled infidelity in your marriage come to light? Have you both decided to stay together and want to do your part to save your marriage? Husband, have you decided to go all in on making it right? Are willing to do whatever it takes to recover from the devastating consequences of your bad decisions, but moving forward in your…
  continue reading
 
It wasn’t until I stopped using pornography altogether and the fog lifted that I learned just how much effect it had had on my brain. The further I got away from the porn and the more days of sobriety I achieved, I found that I was able to think more clearly and process the difficult truth of my sex-addiction. Understanding porn’s effect on my brai…
  continue reading
 
How was your week? Did it go as planned? This week, a verse really hit home for us in a big way... We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps. Proverbs 16:9 Imagine this - just as we were about to hit the button to record today’s podcast episode, a sudden interruption caught us off guard. Johnny received a private message that sparked…
  continue reading
 
After discovering your spouse had betrayed you sexually, what was your initial reaction? We bet it wasn’t joy. We know that there are many volatile emotions that come on the heels of that shocking and devastating news - among them pain, anger, and confusion. As you try to make sense of the senseless in your new unwanted reality, you may find yourse…
  continue reading
 
Many of us have heard the phrase “Freedom Isn’t Free” and if you have not heard it, you likely understand the idea behind it knowing that in order to gain freedom of any kind some form of sacrifice needs to be made. And sacrifices are not called sacrifices because they are easy. Are you feeling like you’re trapped in a never-ending cycle of anger, …
  continue reading
 
The day you never imagined you’d ever live to see has come and gone; D-Day. You have discovered sexual betrayal in your marriage. Whether you found out or your spouse confessed, you can’t believe that this has happened. You may be asking yourself, Is my marriage over? Is it worth saving? Is it possible to move forward? Today we are going to answer …
  continue reading
 
Do you ever stop and wonder why? Why did this happen? Have you lamented, “Can anything good ever come of it?” When the discovery of sexual betrayal threatens to destroy your marriage, you may think you won’t survive it. Then, if you have made the choice to stay and do the hard work of recovery, you start to see God working in your life and marriage…
  continue reading
 
What is isolation, and where does it truly begin? Imagine a lone animal in the wild, separated from its herd. We've all seen those heart-wrenching documentary scenes where isolation turns them into easy prey. Nature's example is a powerful reminder of a harsh reality: when we isolate ourselves from our community, we become vulnerable to the schemes…
  continue reading
 
As a recovering sex-addict, I now find comfort in knowing that my addiction was real and that there is hope through recovery that I will not have to live the rest of my life as a “dis-integrated” man, always trying to hide myself from others based on a lie that if they really knew what I was doing, they would reject me. But I didn’t always understa…
  continue reading
 
Have you ever felt like God was nudging you towards something challenging in life? Maybe a call to step out of your comfort zone and venture into the unknown. It can be intimidating, right? Would you be willing to take that leap of faith and trust that God has your best interests at heart, even when the path ahead seems uncertain? If you have taken…
  continue reading
 
Does a cheating husband who has chosen the path of repentance and recovery experience any losses? The short answer is yes. But it may not be evident to a betrayed wife, especially when stacked up against her seemingly infinite losses. She may not see many tangible losses or consequences for his infidelity. Today, we are going to outline some percei…
  continue reading
 
One of our listeners wrote in to ask a question about how to help her friend who is going through the pain of sexual betrayal. First, we just want to say how grateful we are for those of you who take time to write us and share what’s on your heart. We love to get questions that we can answer from our experience. Please keep them coming! Today we wi…
  continue reading
 
After betrayal, big emotions are a reality. When expressed well and received well, they can be a catalyst for healing and growth. Today we will be talking about big emotions, what they are and how to handle them properly. We will also give you insight to the benefits of working through big emotions together to promote connection and intimacy. We’re…
  continue reading
 
My betrayed sisters, if you were given the opportunity to learn the truth about your spouse’s sexual betrayal, would you take it? My fellow betrayers, if there was a safe and judgement free environment where you could get all your secrets out and alleviate your burden of shame, would you go for it? Would you both be willing to do all it takes to re…
  continue reading
 
Is your marriage thriving after sexual betrayal? Maybe not. Maybe you are just surviving. You might just be at the beginning of the journey to healing and still don’t even know if you want to stay married. Maybe you and your spouse have been working hard on recovering from this devastation, but you aren’t really connecting in a fulfilling way yet. …
  continue reading
 
Wives, has your husband stopped his acting out behavior and is even showing some behaviors that you appreciate, but you still feel like he isn’t a changed man? Do you still feel the distance between you? Like he doesn’t really see you? Husbands, are you doing all the things your wife has requested and feel like you are moving forward in recovery, b…
  continue reading
 
Have you been on the healing journey after sexual betrayal and you and your spouse are ready to level up? Do you want to experience more true intimacy? Today we will be talking about 3 simple steps to take that are not easy because it will involve some risk. But, if you are looking for intimacy that goes far beyond anything that our world has to of…
  continue reading
 
Hopefully you’ve heard both sides of our sexual intimacy story, or lack thereof, in episodes 45 and 46. If not, we encourage you to listen to those to gain a better understanding of how we got to the place where our broken marriage got new life after God intervened and recovery began. Now, we share a wonderfully intimate sexual life together, but i…
  continue reading
 
Men, do you have a secret relationship with pornography and/or others outside of your marriage? Are you consumed by your thought life and hiding things from your wife that you don’t want her to know? Is sex with your wife becoming challenging, difficult, or just too much effort? Do you feel misunderstood? Are you afraid that if she knew everything …
  continue reading
 
Ladies, have you spent years trying to connect with your husband in a meaningful and fulfilling way only to find that you just couldn’t get there no matter what you did? Has it ever occurred to you that you may be trying to experience intimacy with a sex-addict? Seems oxymoronic, right? Intimacy with a sex- addict. We think so as well. But how many…
  continue reading
 
Ladies, now that you know your husband has been unfaithful and broken covenant with you; maybe through pornography use, maybe it even escalated to being sexually active outside of your marriage, I want to ask you, what is your biggest fear? If you are like me, you are afraid that he will do it again. This is a very real and natural thing to be conc…
  continue reading
 
What happens to a marriage, shattered by porn-fueled infidelity, that doesn’t undertake a specific recovery process? What happens to the individuals in that marriage? We believe, it’s likely that this marriage will be devoid of real connection and true intimacy. Sure, it is possible to stay married without recovery. Couples can sweep it under the r…
  continue reading
 
Have you ever experienced a life-changing revelation that compelled you to share it with others and integrate it into your life? This is similar to the impact of embracing recovery and is at the very heart of what we felt when we surrendered to Jesus. Today, we will explore the 12th step of recovery, and how we can actively share our message while …
  continue reading
 
Do you find it difficult to connect with God and know his will for your life? If you said yes, you are not alone. Just like the recovery journey, it takes a lot of persistent and consistent effort to cultivate a close relationship with the Lord. It doesn’t come naturally to us mere humans, but there is a roadmap for discovering how to make connecti…
  continue reading
 
Let us be the first to wish you a happy Valentine’s Day! Okay, how did that make you feel? Did you smile? Did it make you cringe? Did it bring up a feeling of excitement, or anger or even dread? We’ve found that Valentine’s Day is a tricky holiday. Well, it’s not a public holiday, but it is a recognized day on the calendar for celebrating love betw…
  continue reading
 
Do you have a daily practice of self-reflection? Do you ever stop to take stock in how you act, think, and feel when relating to others? Most of us have heard the phrase - wash, rinse, repeat. And no, we aren’t talking about the latest greatest shampoo. Today as we talk about the 10th Step in SSA Recovery we will peel back the layers of what a dail…
  continue reading
 
Last week we asked the question: Have you ever hurt someone and come to not only realize that you hurt them but understood exactly how you hurt them? This week we want to ask: Have you felt any fear or intimidation when making the choice to go back and right that wrong? We have a special guest today who is going to share with us his experience with…
  continue reading
 
Have you ever hurt someone and come to not only realize that you had hurt them, but understood exactly how you hurt them? Today as we cover the 8th step of recovery of Sex Addicts Anonymous, it is time to do the work of making a list of those we've harmed through our destructive sexual behaviors and become willing to make amends. Working this step …
  continue reading
 
Have you come to a place in life where you have been humbled by your own actions and are ready to move forward with hope and integrity? It is time to approach God humbly and ask him do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. From the Green Book of Recovery: "We may wonder why it is necessary to ask humbly. Many of us have confused humility with hum…
  continue reading
 
Have you come to a place where you understand that some of the things that you do are not beneficial for you? Or are even hurtful to others? What do you do once you’ve discovered this? Do you say, “Well, that’s just me.” Or, do you decide that you want to change these behaviors for your own good and the good of those you love? If so, how do you go …
  continue reading
 
Have you noticed that New Year’s resolutions don’t last much past January for most people? Statistically, 91% of Americans fail at New Year’s resolutions. That’s not very encouraging. We were going to talk about the reasons why resolutions are so hard to keep in today’s episode, but then Holy Spirit intervened. So, we threw out our outline and just…
  continue reading
 
Before you got married, you had in your head an idea of what you wanted your marriage to look like. You had all kinds of hopes and dreams and they were all good, positive things and you made plans according to this picture in your mind. But things didn’t go exactly as planned. This is not the first time this story has played out. God made plans for…
  continue reading
 
Have you gotten to the point in your life where you are ready to tell someone else every terrible thing that you’ve done in your life? If this thought doesn't excite you or possibly even terrifies you, then you’re in good company. Baring our souls to another person is not something we come by naturally. However, the longer we keep secrets locked be…
  continue reading
 
Have you turned your will and your life over to the care of God? Are you ready to gain an understanding of how you violated your personal moral boundaries and allowed addiction to set into your life? From the Green Book of Recovery: In taking the 4th step, we begin to know ourselves for who we really are. Building on the foundation of the first 3 s…
  continue reading
 
Is the holiday season hard for you after sexual betrayal? Or any date that reminds you of the devastation that sexual betrayal brings into a marriage? It sure was for us in the beginning. What is a healthy way to deal with these triggers when they occur? Today we are going to have a conversation about how these dubious dates affected our marriage a…
  continue reading
 
Have you admitted your powerlessness over your porn addiction? Have you come to believe that a power greater than yourself can restore you to sanity? These two questions encapsulate steps 1 and 2 of the Sex Addicts Anonymous 12-step recovery program. In today’s episode we will unpack Step 3. which focuses on surrendering our plans and path. Are you…
  continue reading
 
What does Thanksgiving Day mean to you? Here in the United States, it is recognized as a national holiday on the 3rd Thursday of November each year. Today we want to look beyond what’s considered to be the traditional activities of this special day, such as gathering of family, turkey dinner with all the fixings, football, post dinner food comas, a…
  continue reading
 
Loading …

クイックリファレンスガイド