Matthew Schott, the man behind CCRH and the voice of Pastor Clearwater, has a BRAND NEW one-man improv performance, THE SAGA OF THE SHINING EMBLEM, that will have its world premiere Friday March 2nd, 2018 at 10:30pm at The PIT Loft! Matt recently appeared on the Pro Wrestling Podcast Much Ado About Wrestling, to talk about his new show, and give an…

https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/09/ccrh-trial-final.mp3 Pastor Clearwater, It has come to my attention that your time at the Beavertail Historical Society has come to a firey end. It would appear we need to, once again, find a new placement for you. This time, I have an idea that I believe should suit your particular skill set. Its well…

While the Pastor prepares for another new job as part of his community service, he tries to knock out a few more hours by testing his skills as an audiobook narrator. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/06/ccrh_adventure_1.mp3 Listen as the Pastor guides you through a spooky new interactive audiobook from the good people at Industrial Illus…

https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/04/ep3_edit1.mp3 Pastor Clearwater, It has come to my attention that your time in the employment of the local bowling alley has come to an end. I thought that you could keep yourself out of trouble at such a simple job but it appears I gave you too much credit. I spoke with the alley and apparently you im…

https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/03/ep_2_edit1.mp3 Pastor Clearwater, It has come to my attention that there was yet another tragedy in the halls of John Wilkes Booth Secular Academy for Grades K-12. Unfortunately it would seem your former superior and Lunch Czar was actually notorious Russian gangster (NAME REDACTED). The majority of th…

In light of the recent woes at the newspaper, the Pastor takes on the responsibility of reading a backlog of missed obituaries from Beavertail. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/03/ccrh_obitiuary_1.mp3 Listen as the Pastor pays tribute to a number of fallen townspeople (incidentally, many of whom have appeared on this program). The Pastor…

Pastor Clearwater, My name is Ethel Laharl, I’m the social worker assigned to your case. As you know, your official sentence was 13 weeks community service for the crimes of “Name Lying” and “Baring False Witness Upon name of the Church”. You are therefor going to be given a job here in town which you shall work at in order to pay your debt to the …

Pastor Clearwater returns on March 6th. In the meantime, get ready for the new season by diving into the world of Beavertail Detective, Jim Silvers. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/03/jim-final2.mp3 Silver Streak: Chapter 4, Forget It Jim… Jim Silvers goes into the sewers for the thrilling conclusion of Silver Streak. What will he find …

Pastor Clearwater returns on March 6th. In the meantime, get ready for the new season by diving into the world of Beavertail Detective, Jim Silvers. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/02/silverstreakep3final.mp3 Silver Streak: Chapter 3, The Axe Man Cometh Detective Jim Silvers takes up smoking, switches his focus to a different case, and …

Pastor Clearwater returns on March 6th. In the meantime, get ready for the new season by diving into the world of Beavertail Detective, Jim Silvers. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/02/silverstreakep2final.mp3 Silver Streak: Chapter 2, Lost In The Supermarket Detective Jim Silvers continues his hunt for any information about the missing …

Pastor Clearwater returns on March 6th. In the meantime, get ready for the new season by diving into the world of Beavertail Detective, Jim Silvers. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2017/02/silverstreakep1final.mp3 Silver Streak: Chapter 1, The Hunt Begins Detective Jim Silvers takes over the reigns of the podcast in the absence of Pastor Cre…

Hey Everyone, I realize I’ve neglected to actually tell you what’s going on in these episodes and accidentally been posting my emails instead. That ends now. In the Season Finale, The Pastor invites the rest of the religious figures from the town over for an old-fashioned “Pastor-Off.” Things become tense. Someone might lose their church. Someone m…

The trial of the century, The People vs. Donald Falcom, has come to a close. As per Beavertail tradition, the all-female jury returned from their delibirations at the Beavertail Holiday Inn’s special Jury Delibiration chamber and spa, to announce their verdict. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/12/ccrh-scary-stories_edit2.mp3 After weeks …

The town of Beavertail has been rocked a PTA election that left 26 people dead, a snake infestation and an animal uprising but now its about about to face the biggest thing It’s seen all year: A trial. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/11/ccrh_10_edit2.mp3 Donald Falcon, local podcast engineer is facing murder charges after the body of hi…

Strap-in, ladies and gentlemen. The recording you are about to hear is from an ACTUAL classroom. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/ccrh-mini-subsitute.mp3 Beavertail Middle School has become the first of what is sure to be tens of hundreds of schools taking part in a brand new audio-substitute teacher program the Pastor and I created. …

ATTENTION BEAVERTAIL! This is an urgent news bulletin. The body of local resident and best selling author, Todd Sinnoh was discovered this morning in the Murasaki Woods two miles south of the Main Street Denny’s. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/ccrh-ep9-edit3-1.mp3 The body was discovered last night at 2am by local high school studen…

THE PASTOR IS BACK THIS WEEK WITH A VERY SPECIAL OFFER!! THIS IS ONE EXCITING BARGAIN YOU AREN’T GOING TO WANT TO PASS UP!! YOU AREN’T GOING TO FIND SAVINGS LIKE THIS ANYWHERE ELSE IN TOWN!!! THOSE IN NEED OF TRANSPORTATION PLEASE LISTEN AND CONTACT THE PASTOR OR MYSELF IMMEDIATELY!!!! https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/08/ccrh-mini-car.mp…

Mr. Donald Falcon, My name is Patty Audino. I am writing to you on behalf of the Beavertail Public Library to ask you to please return the following books: Investing in Incesting: The Do’s and Don’ts of Sibling Seduction – Ted Trubbish Email Management: How to Prevent Embarrassing Emails from Leaking Online – Jessica Cofagrigus The Ultimate Guide t…

Description: Exciting News everybody! We have a special treat for you this week, a brand new mini-episode of the Creedence Clearwater Revival Hour, Live from the Beavertail Animal Shelter! This one is for all you animal lovers out there! https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/08/ccrh_mini_voicemail.mp3 On a totally unrelated note, does anyone …

Hello, This is an automated message being sent out to the entirety of Beavertail (Or at least the ones of ya’ll whose email addresses I was able to find which, to be honest, wasn’t many) regarding a new missing person here in town. Local resident and best-selling author, Todd Sinnoh has been missing for 48 hours now. He was last seen leaving the De…

The Pastor is gearing up for big things at the church, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have time to put in one of his patent-pending go-bags! This week the Pastor really outdoes himself with some exciting news about the church and some helpful advice for your daily life! The Pastor truly is your own personal saint.* https://theatrecpt.files.wordpr…

This episode of CCRH was recorded live at Cornerstone Studios in New York City, on June 26th, 2016, as part of the Uptown Arts Stroll. The Pastor and I hit the road to do a special show in the Big Apple-like city of New York! We had talked all things animals with Safari Scott, Beavertail’s resident animal expert! Also, we would like to address a le…

Pastor, My name is Marshall Eagleman, I work at Morris-Marker Book Publishers. Recently I received an unsolicited manuscript from an author using the nom de plume: “Don, the Man You should Marry” whom I believe to be an associate of yours, one Donald Falcon. The manuscript, titled “Insist on Love, or How I learned to love the one I am SUPPOSED to l…

It’s that time of the year again!! The Revival Church is holding their annual Yard Sale to raise funds to buy the church a proper podium the pastor can stand behind. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/06/ccrh-yard-sale-edit-2.mp3 As we all know, this tradition started last year after we got numerous complaints about the stack of Amazon.com…

Pastor, Before you release the next episode of your podcast with those creepy conjoined twins I was hoping you could take a look at this passage from the novel I was working on. I think that once this is done my sister will FINALLY understand that it doesn’t matter how many times you are on the “New York Times Best Seller List”, what matters is whi…

After pulling MANY strings, Pastor Clearwater has landed a brand new guest for this EXCLUSIVE EXTRA LONG EPISODE!! https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/05/ccrh_mini_snakes_edit1-1.mp3 Pastor Clearwater has a treat in store for you all today! Reverend Bernard Kaber-Shaw has come all the way from Crumdun with his collection of hundreds of pois…

Critical Point is currently working on bringing our new show Phreaking to San Francisco! In this audio special, we will hear how the show has developed over the process. We will also sit down with Dylan James Amick, as he answers some questions about why we are so enamored with this show and its subject matter. Finally, we will also hear a trail…

Pastor, I know that you need help with your podcast but frankly I don’t care. All you did this week was sit around and talk to some people from that old folks home on Birch Street anyway, no one is going to care. More importantly, I think I really messed up. You told me that women respond really well to big romantic gestures so I went over to my si…

Dum Dum Dum Dum! Dum Dum Dum Dum! You know what that means (assuming you’ve read that in the correct rhythm) wedding season is JUST around the corner! NOTHING is more stressful than planning a wedding but never fear because Pastor Clearwater is here to help! With this pre-recorded wedding you can turn any wedding into a GREAT wedding (as opposed to…

Pastor, PLEASE DO NOT SHOW THIS EMAIL TO ANYONE!!! Now that thats out of the way, for your next episode’s description just write something about how you had on that crazy woman from the PTA and her idiot lawyer and you talked about blah blah blah I don’t care. More importantly, you posted my last email as the description for your last podcast. MY S…

Pastor Clearwater is back with his award-winning* Sermon-on-the-go series! Join the Pastor as he discusses a subject near and dear to his heart: Integrity. Find out how faith and integrity go hand in hand** and how you can live your life as a better person through the teachings of Pastor Clearwater*** https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/03/…

Pastor, I think there was a bit of a mix-up with the last podcast you put out. I wasn’t saying that you should just copy and paste the e-mail I had sent you and use that for the episode description. Having the entirety of an e-mail from me as a description is just going to confuse people. That being said, regarding your next podcast you should call…

So You Want To Start A Podcast? What’s wrong with you? Why would you want to do that? Are none of the four original and frequently updated CPT podcasts enough for you? Okay, whatever. So you’re gonna start your own brand new podcast, huh tough guy…well what’s it gonna be about? Who’s story will we be following? What kind of talent do you need for y…

Too busy to stop in to church every Sunday? Pastor Clearwater has got you covered with the first in his brand new “Sermon-on-the-go” series. In the first of these shorts, Pastor Clearwater answers a touching letter from a young boy seeking guidance. Take a listen and maybe you too will find yourself inspired while you drive. ***Although as a legal …

Pastor, I got your email about your podcast. I think thats great that you want to do one! I’d be more than happy to help you come up with a name for your first episode. Why not, “Meet Pastor Clearwater!” or “Police, Chiropractor, Dog-Walker” In terms of a description for the episode, thats pretty simple. Just copy and paste this: “Pastor Creedence …

In anticipation of his podcast debut on Sunday, here’s a message from Pastor Creedence Clearwater himself, and a few words from his sound engineer, Don. https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/02/ccrhfinalad.mp3 Hello people of Beavertail, Pastor Creedence Clearwater, from the Revival Church is launching a brand new podcast. He sent me over an …

Podcast Head Honcho, Andrew Terrance Kaberline addresses the listeners about the changes in the podcasts, and the launch of new episodes on February 14th. You can listen to the audio version of the address, or you can read it in text form https://theatrecpt.files.wordpress.com/2016/02/stateofthepod.mp3 Andrew addresses why we do podcasts (1:15), wh…