Episode 211 - Garbage

Here's What I Don't Get

In order to combat the worldwide C-Virus that was unleashed upon the world in 2020, there was only one thing we could do: fight virus with virus. Research started by HWIDG Corp indicated that only a mutated strain of the C-Virus had a chance at defeating the original strain. After a series of breakthrough animal tests by Dr. Tab Birt, human trials began, but something went wrong. The mutated strain reacted quite negatively to the human neural system and the test subjects were turned into slow-moving but deadly mindless monsters. But Dr. Birt would not be stopped. In a last ditch effort he injected the mutated strain into the strongest man he knew. Thus was born the T-Virus, housed in the body of his former best friend, now a hulking, intelligent bioweapon. The only thing that could stop this hideous monster was:
- Why There Isn't a John Wick Game
- A Ticking Clock Over Your Head
- Pandemic Bell Ringers
- Trimming the Tree

It's obvious, don't you think? The ultimate action movie badass. Guns, kung-fu, driving, bosses, cool lore, just all the makings for a great game. Yet, we've gotten one attempt so far and it was WAY off-base. Is it coming? Will it ever happen? Only time will tell... wait I'm just remembering they but him in Fortnite, so problem solved! That definitely counts!
Deadlines suck, but are necessary for businesses and such. Where they aren't needed are on Netflix telling me that if I don't finish all 9 seasons of The Virginian in 2 weeks I'll be screwed because they're kicking it off to make room for Generic Teen Drama #372. You put that deadline on me and force me to choose? I'll always choose to just leave.

It's 2020, people. We've already got robotic sign spinners, don't we? How hard is it to put a pair of bells on the same contraption? I feel a lot less hate towards the robot begging me for money in 2020 of all years with our government telling us you can't go out and can't go to work, but senator Johnson can collect a way-too-much paycheck while blocking every bill that would give us peons a modicum of relief all while doing some insider trading.
Trees should stay outside. Some idiot pagan probably thought his druid wife's soul was passed on into her favorite tree, so he cut it down and dressed it up ( and probably drilled a couple holes into the trunk, if you know what I mean), and now, 1000 years later, every year we get a bunch of green plastic in the shape of a tree and cover it in lights and tinsel and little mementos of your childhood. And I can't stand it. It needs to all go away, preferably into a fire.
All this and more on this week’s episode! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD, and support us on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT!