ERP 267: 4 Healthy Ways To Manage Jealousy In Relationship - An interview With Dr. Joli Hamilton


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In today's episode, Dr. Joli Hamilton speaks about jealousy, defining what jealousy is and approaching jealousy in a relationship. Jealousy isn't a simple emotion and is made in tangled layers of gross emotions we don't like to feel, such as sadness, anger, grief, arousal, and fear.

Jealousy reminds us that we love, lust, and desire someone that has this strange tone. Envy plays along with jealousy as we are wishing we had something someone else has. Insecurity plays a role as it's a root cause of intense jealousy and reduces our resilience in relationships.

Listen in to learn how to separate the feelings of insecurity from jealousy, what can be perceived as a threat in a relationship, and why we wish we could be protected from jealousy.

(Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)


Dr. Joli Hamilton is a research psychologist, best-selling author, TEDx speaker, and AASECT certified sex educator. She has spent the past two decades balancing a wild entrepreneurial spirit with a deep desire to have a secure, passionate partnership along with raising 7 kids along the way! Joli is committed to helping women create sustainable, soul-nourishing relationships without sacrificing their career dreams.

In this episode, Dr. Hamilton & Dr. Jessica Higgins discuss:

  • The definition of jealousy as it applies to relationships
  • Why imagining our relationship being interrupted by another can provoke jealousy
  • How insecurity plays into jealousy in a relationship
  • Why envy results from insecurity
  • Work we can do to improve our own self-esteem
  • Types of threats people can perceive with jealousy
  • The importance of why we need to feel like we have something to give in a relationship
  • Variables that can affect jealousy in a relationship
  • Why having mutual understanding is so important
  • How childhood trauma affects jealousy
  • Techniques for managing jealousy
  • Why monogamy doesn’t protect you from feelings of jealousy
  • Grief plays a significant role in jealousy
  • Four ways to deal with jealousy


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Twitter: @DrJessHiggins



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