Episode 249 - Kebert Xela (feat. Tyrone Watermelon)

Here's What I Don't Get

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On this week's episode we talk about that mistake that has plagued us for 20 years. 20 years ago our great nation's leaders made a terrible decision and it has now, finally come to bite us in our rear. The wake of destruction it has caused is immeasurable. Of course I'm talking about the 2001 film Freddy Got Fingered. A supposed "comedy" film, this waste of time and money was thrust upon Americans and for the last 20 years has been a black mark on our great nation's history. It's so bad, that I'm pretty sure it's responsible for something that happened about 5 months after its box office debut. So join us in reveling that we may never see it again, along with:
- Jeopardy Host Debacle
- The U.S. Dollar
- People That Don't Value Pets

Who's going to be the new host of Jeopardy? Well, no one at this rate. All these prospective hosts are getting shot down like flies by the cancel gun. People want the perfect person, as if Trebek wasn't absolutely hammered during filming, being half a beer away from an on-air Bill O'Reilly moment. There's never going to be your unicorn. So just pick a non-serial killer that has a modicum of charm and get going or else we're going to have to wait another 10 years until Weird Al makes a new Jeopardy-themed parody.
Dollars. Bucks. Greenbacks. Simoleans. Smackeroos. C-notes. Dead Presidents. Whatever you call them, they're a dying product. Most of the world's money is a jar of IOUs that get traded around and stapled to other IOUs as interest. Your bank account? Not actually money. Your taxes? Not actually money, but if you don't pay them, the government comes after you for real money to pay them the fake money they owe someone else but won't themselves pay off. It's like that guy that always borrows five bucks from you and swears he'll make it up at the casino when he hits it big. And the unban him.
Pets are not children. They are also not replaceable vermin just because pet shops exist and grandpa shops don't. You take care of them and they take care of you. They truly become family members in their times with us. Except your cat wont go on a racist rant at Thanksgiving. You ae their whole world for as long as you are lucky to have them. Love your pets, folks.
All this and more on this week's episode! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD, support us on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT.